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"Take My Life...Please!" is the first segment of the twenty-second episode of the first season ...

"Take My Life...Please!" is the first segment of the twenty-second episode of the first season (1985-1986) of the American television series The Twilight Zone. Billy Diamond (Tim Thomerson), a successful stand-up comedian, steals a routine from Dave (Xander Berkeley), another comedian, and performs it on a TV talk show, to huge success enhancing his own career but harming Dave who originated this "bit", since he now cannot perform his own material without being accused of having stolen it. While driving away from the TV studio, Billy is ambushed by Dave, who threatens him with a pistol. Dave attempts to get money from Billy to make up for stealing his act, but Billy tries driving the car crazy and Dave, unintentionally, shoots him dead. Billy now finds himself in the afterlife, which turns out to resemble the backstage area of an extremely sleazy nightclub. His new agent, Max, explains he must go audition on stage. A stage manager pushes him out onto a stage in front of a bored-looking audience. When Billy tells conventional jokes, the audience grows hostile and they taunt him with remarks such as "tell us about how your mother died." In order to make the audience laugh, Billy must